Regrets of suicide

Felix Okoye

– The pains were there, eating deep in my soul.
The sorrows were there, entangling my every thought.

I thought I was strong enough.
I thought I could be my own hope.
I thought I could fight it all alone.
I thought I could still be strong.

But, there I was.
Clouded in the pool of my own tears.
There I was,
Fighting with the last breaths in me.
There I was, sobbing cos I never wanted you to hear.


I got no help from you.
No consolation I could find.
My friends were all too busy.
Then the thought of ending it all, gripped my spirit, soul and body.


That substance looked like a juice which has the ingredients of love.
As I gulped it down my throat. I tasted nothing but life, never knowing it’s the end of life.

I want to see you all again, to tell you how lonely it is here.
I wish I could see you all again, to tell you all I went through.
I want to tell you to be strong, not being strong by yourself, but to speak up, loud enough to be heard. Someone out there could help you out.

I wish I never listened to my thoughts.
I wish I never ended the life in me.
Now my spirit is filled with regrets.
I wish I would get a second life.


Written by Joy Starglow

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